Thursday, May 29, 2008

You can’t expect anything from people. It’s like sitting them on a stool, saying, “hold still” and trying to paint them. They’re going to blink, or start slouching and eventually they’ll have to go to the bathroom. And anyway, it’s your image, not their identity. You are prioritizing your perception over their reality. This is not true love.

Emotions are the result of unfulfilled expectations. God gets angry, jealous, happy…so He has expectations, doesn’t He? Yet He’s capable of true love.

This all came up as my friend Jason and I sat in his living room, lit only by the extraterrestrial glow of the TV set. I was playing with his son’s literally brick-sized Legos, separating them by color, then building something that resembled a hawk’s talon, and after a few alterations, a neck brace. I told him I couldn’t make sense of things because I have compulsive sympathy – I believe whoever’s in front of me. I decide something, then undecide it because I resent having to decide to begin with.

Today is Thursday. Not Wednesday or Friday. Thursday.

I know that.

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